Going Pro in Encouragement

 Several years ago, I had offered up a compliment to a fellow believer.  The recipient made the comment that they didn't know if I was telling the truth or trying to flatter them. Welp, that was a slap in the face that took me aback.  Because I'd had the fortune of walking with Jesus for a while, I took some time to assess my motives.  I was happy to discover that I wasn't interested in flattering, but honestly wanted this person to know I'd appreciated whatever it was for which I'd encouraged them.  To be truthful, that comment did a number on my spirit for some time.  I'd discovered that I valued that person's opinion more than I valued the Lord's prompting to offer up encouragement.  I also learned that person's response came from a place of deep insecurity, hence the comment.  What I had to work through was balancing a motive check with obedience to His leading with call He has placed on my life to be an encourager.  He has gifted me with the desire to influence through encouragement to see other believers be all that He has made them to be for His glory.  

So fast forward to today.  Our church has been participating in a 50 for 50 series.  It's fifty minutes for fifty days to incorporate biblical habits into one's life.  The four areas of concentration are prayer, reading, exercise and encouragement.  It's been a life changing challenge for me, to say the least. While I'd created habits for prayer, reading and encouragement, I figured the exercise would be my daily battle.  Oh, do I love how He reminds me that my thoughts are not His!  The biggest challenge has been the encouragement component, which has caused me to go deeper in to studying this concept of encouraging another. What He has prompted me to do is to be quiet, pray and wait for His prompt on the person. I've yet to have Him tell me how to encourage the person, but rather to just be obedient. There have been days that the prompt has been easy.  There have been days that it's been a challenge.  There has been one day that I knew the best encouragement I could do would be to pray for that individual because they are not in a place to receive a word from me. In the over two weeks I've been doing this, the outcome has left me so joy filled, because the joy is rooted in obedience to Him. He has challenged my "people opinion" thinking on this and I've given that up to Him.  I'm not responsible for any response, but rather my planting and watering seeds of encouragement.  And the Lord being

the Lord, has spurred some recipients to share how obedience to His prompt has lifted spirits, strengthened their resolve, or to know they are loved.  While it may not seem like a big deal, it is to Jesus!

I found a biblical definition of encouragement that gave me a lot to contemplate.  From the AV1611 site: ENCOUR'AGE, (v.t. enkur'rage.) To give courage to; to give or increase confidence of success; to inspire with courage, spirit, or strength of mind; to embolden; to animate; to incite; to inspirit.

The lessons I've learned have been many.  Encouragement is more than a kind word, although that's the easiest one for me.  It can also be challenging words that will move from a place of potential destruction to a place of victory, and those should almost always be done face to face! Encouragement can be delivering a Starbucks to a friend and letting them know they are seen in their discouragement.  It can be sending up a prayer, knowing that what that person is in need of is the Lord himself, not my opinion or input.  Encouragement is quite simply meeting people where they are and being the catalyst that He uses to grow and mold them into all He's created them to be!

One last thought, one of my top favorite bible characters is Barnabas.  His name means encourager, and he lived up to his name.  While his story isn't a long one, his life was one of great influence on the spread of the gospel and those who carried to far reaching places on earth.  A side note here - not everyone is called or created to be a Moses or a Paul. The Bible is full of people who were mentioned once or twice that had mighty impact for the kingdom.  Do not allow anyone to compare your gifting with another or diminish HIS calling on your life. It is all important to Jesus!

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.  1 Thessalonians 5:11

I'm back!

I'm back.  After what I feel has been a period of wandering the desert where writing has been concerned, He's opened it up again.  He's giving me lessons to share, and I've been putting Him off, quite honestly.  Why?  Because of a wrong mindset.  I shared with the roomie the other day that I had a blog that's been rolling around, yet my mind keeps going back to who cares what I have to say?  And I am 100% right because who cares what I have to say... this is His teaching. I am just the conduit.  Yet, I delayed a couple of days.  And the Lord, in his indescribable mercy, gave me a gift this morning.  I went back and reread some past blogs.  Many tears flowed.  He has given me some great insights because He loves me so much!  So, now I write for Him, to record the lessons for me to look back, to know just how MUCH He loves me because He never gives up on me!

I am praying for anyone who may read this.  Know that YOU have a place in His plan for the Kingdom.  Do not let the seen and unseen critics in your life to lie to you in saying that you don't.  You have a purpose.  Embrace it!

A Black Eye, a Repentant Heart, and a Call to Action

 And so it comes to pass.

This past weekend I took fall #2 for 2021.  It was a stupid mistake on my part as I know better than to leave a tote bag on the floor without tucking in the handles.  My right toe caught the handle and down I went.  I couldn't even break my fall, hitting my right eye (with glasses on) smack on the concrete floor.  The fall required a visit to the ER and that's where this story begins.

We arrived at one of the local hospitals around 9:15 pm.  I checked in and waited about 15 minutes to be triaged.  Since my entire career has been spent medical adjacent, I always enjoy visiting with the staff, but especially during this past 20 months.  These medical professionals have experienced so much and they are exhausted.  I've made it my personal mission to thank everyone who serves in this capacity when I get the opportunity.  Not because I am that kind, but because they truly deserve it!  My triage nurse was a hoot and we hit it off.  During our repartee, she shared that they had experienced the most covid patients on Saturday since the start of the pandemic. I wish I could say I was surprised, but given our testing numbers lately, I wasn't. She told me that they were going to send me to x-ray and it would be a wait afterwards for a room to be seen by the ER physician. The trip to x-ray was quick and efficient.  Then the wait began.  About an hour and a half later, I was taken back to a room.  What I saw when I was taken back was what we have hoped would not happen in this pandemic... an ER surge.

I can only credit the Lord with the fact that I was placed in a room.  There were 4 patients in beds in the hallways and every room was occupied. After a brief intake process, the doctor came into see me.  He was upbeat and did the routine check-up, noting that he felt a CT was in order even though I was alert and coherent.  I agreed and he sheepishly said, "It will be awhile as you are #17 in line".  Ugh.  Poor Sherri was hanging with me and we knew we were in for a wait.  At 1:30 a.m., they came to take me to get CT and those in the halls had increased by two.  One person was in a full gall bladder attack, in the hall, roiling on the bed.  Folks, I've been there and I can tell you NO ONE wants to be in a hall, on a bed, for everyone to see when you are THAT miserable. Two seemed to be resting, and a patient that they had placed outside of my room was in some kind of serious intestinal distress. She was SICK and pretty much needed a nurse the entire night! Because I know about infection control procedures, I knew there were COVID positive patients in rooms that required multiple nurses intervening in full personal protective gear that is changed with every room.  Upon return from the CT scan, we didn't see anyone until the doctor came in my room at 5:45ish. Between those two times, I would get up out of my bed and watch the activity.  The one tech in ER was on a dead run the entire time I was there.  The few nurses I saw only sat long enough to chart and then back taking care of the next patient.  

I will admit that I was frustrated in the wait.  Then the Lord gently reminded me that I could be one of these really sick patients. Ouch.  Yeah, it was a necessity that I make that trip to the ER.  However, I could be a whole lot worse off than I was.  I decide to pray for the staff and patients.  I'd been humbled to realize that I am what I abhor... an entitled American.  I am used to having access to great care at a moment's notice.  I had come to believe that it is my right. Well, the Spirit had something contrary to say about that!  He reminded me of the places that I have visited around the world that those sweet people would be so grateful to be resting in one of those beds in the hallway and unbelievably thankful for the care.  There I stood being a brat because I wanted to just go home.

When the doctor came in at about 5:45 a.m., he sat down and looked completely beat.  He asked how I was doing and I said I was ready to go home... he said, yeah, me too.  (yes, conviction #2 hit then... I am a slow learner sometimes!) I can't explain the exhaustion on his face as he shared that they were so very short staffed and another local hospital was refusing to receive ambulance calls, so it was all on this ER to do so.  My heart hurts as I type that.  The pain that I feel for them all runs deep.  And it's precisely why we have seen so many abandon the healthcare field in the past 2 years - exhaustion, frustration, and ingrates like me.

So my main reason for all of this is back to my first sentence... and so it comes to pass.  For 2 years we in public health have been warning about this critical issue because of the added stress of a global pandemic.  Please stay with me on this.  I do not care one iota about your opinions on COVID, vaccines, the politics of this pandemic, or masking in public.  I really don't and I don't expect you to care about mine.  What I care about is the toll our health decisions and expectations are taking on the critical healthcare workforce that is already in crisis and has been for many years.  We have known there is a nursing shortage that began in the 1990's and has exponentially gotten worse.  We are seeing doctors retire sooner than they anticipated due to a variety of reasons that have taken the joy out of doing what they have studied and feel called to do.  It is not their job to take care of our health - IT IS OURS! We've become so entitled that we put unrealistic expectations on them to fix whatever with a pill. We've also been conditioned to seek medical attention for most anything.  We often do not do what is recommended because it's our right to live as we want and it's often work to get or keep ourselves healthy. Then we are ticked when we can't get care as quickly as we'd like or need.  As I was telling my brother about the experience the next day, he said it best.  We have to do our best to take care of our health.  So we talked about some plans to improve upon that starting today.  I want to do all I can to make sure I don't overwhelm the system needlessly so it's available when I truly do need it.  So much of our health is truly within our realm to control. I want to champion those who are doing this day in and day out.  If you are a health care provider in any setting, know that you are seen and appreciated for the work you do.  We have some of the best medical care in the world, let's protect that precious gift!

Think this is bad? You should see the other guy!😂

Tucking In

 Pandemic.  I have come to loathe that word for so many reasons.  Yet, I am realizing a new layer of Carla amidst all of it.  Bear with me here... I know we all are dealing with this on different fronts and this is not about bemoaning all the negative associated with it.  It's about realizing that there is such beauty in the difficult circumstances in life.

Time for true confession.  My soul has not been well. It's been distracted, afraid, angry, exhausted.  Oh, I've done all the things I've known to do...pray, go to the Word, quoting Scripture to fight the feelings.  Yet... the fruit in my life has been anything but Christ-like.  My mouth has spewed such negativity that I can't stand myself.  My attitude has been one of judgment towards others that don't believe as I do.  My love for others has turned to disdain at times.  

It was all coming to a head last Wednesday.  I apologized to some of my co-workers for my attitude and was realizing that we were trying to do the impossible - fix this problem.  The Lord had opened my eyes to the fact that without vision, people perish (Thank you to one of the Jesus girls (Kira) in my life for sharing that verse from Proverbs 29:18!).  I'd lost the vision for our role in this whole thing - so we reverted back to our mission of preserve, promote and protect.  We cannot change that which will not be changed.  We can do our part, but we are not responsible for the choices of others.  And then He moved in.

Right after I spoke to them, I had a gall bladder attack that reached a 9 on a 10 point pain scale. It was a doozy.  I couldn't think, I couldn't concentrate and I couldn't get relief.  A few phone calls later and an open schedule, I was set for surgery on Friday to remove the angry little organ.  I honestly went into this surgery a broken woman spiritually and emotionally.  I was fearful in a way I had never been before.  I felt distant from the Lord. I was annoyed that yet another physical problem had presented itself and I was going to be away from work.  Fortunately, I had a host of believers praying for me and it has been amazing to see just how completely the Lord answers them.  Yes, I am feeling great and there were zero complications from surgery.  But what's even better is that this pause and their prayers have allowed me to spend time with the Lord in deeper ways. NEVER view a pause as a negative in the Lord's economy.  A wait, a rest, a stepping away from the norm (which is exactly what this whole pandemic has blessed the world with!) is a gift from Him to reconnect, rejuvenate our spirit, and to regenerate our passion for Him - if we allow. 

Today, in my prayer and reading, so much jumped off the pages, went into my brain and traveled the 18 inches to the depths of my heart.  He loves me so much.  I confessed my fears of pleasing the world over pleasing Him.  I laid my weary spirit at the foot of His throne.  He lifted me up as a Father who loves me without condition.  Psalm 103 was a healing balm to my soul.  He knows how weak I am yet I try to fake it til I make it with my own strength.  He never intends for me to do that but rather that I rest in Him.  Then the sweet voice of my Lord spoke to my heart, "Tuck in, girl. I've got you!"  That was a wow moment.  I've always said lean in when the going gets rough, and while it's true, it sounds like I am the one who has to do all the work.  Not so.  Tucking in under the arm of Almighty God... well there is no safer place to be.  No place of love and care more complete.  Today is a turning point and I am excited to see what adventures He has planned as I rest in Him.

Proverbs 1:33 - But whoso hearkeneth unto me shall dwell safely, and shall be quiet from the fear of evil.

Wonky prayers

Flowers from Jesus

I am over this pandemic. For those of us who are on the front lines of this situation, it's been quite an experience.  On a positive note, I get to work with some of the best people at our health department.  They have stepped up in ways they never imagined they'd have to and have made this a true team approach.  Still, it's been tiring.  The thing is, the other things that we do don't stop.  It's overwhelming.  I don't say this for you to pity me... I just know many can relate when we are not in a pandemic.

A couple of weeks ago I was feeling so alone.  Don't get me wrong, the Ewing tribe, my Jesus girls, my MCBC Tribe have all been wonderfully supportive.  Yet, here I sat feeling totally by myself.  I felt unacknowledged and frankly, sorry for myself.  Yep, I am so totally human and a hot mess more often than not.  The one thing I do have going for me is that I love to talk to the Lord.  Prayer has become a part of my DNA.  My go to most of the time.  I am so weak and I've learned the hard way that I HAVE to draw my strength from my relationship with Him, so I am in constant chatter with Him.  I have to read the "Be Still" scripture to remind myself to listen too. ;)

Sometimes I pray really wonky, selfish prayers and this day happened to be one of those days.  I wanted to feel valued by Jesus.  He understands me so well and he has often answered these prayers just to build this weak woman's faith.  So, I prayed for flowers.  I asked Jesus to send me flowers.  I was thinking a sweet bouquet to brighten up my table. No biggie for the One who created flowers and owns the cattle on a thousand hills.  But oh how my Lord loves to surprise and wow my little thoughts!

I  enjoy taking a walk on the road north of my house.  There is a couple there that have a most gorgeous yard. They labor intensively and the fruit of the labor is breathtaking.  As I walked past their house I waved and then saw them waving me down upon my return trip.  I stopped and they offered me some divided lilies and I said sure as these are favorites of mine. Two hours later I was telling a friend about the sweet gesture and the Lord gently reminded me - I gave you the flowers you asked for, my girl.  I am sure my face was priceless as I realized He had answered my prayers.  And in typical fashion, He one upped my request.  Instead of a bouquet that will die in a few days, these flowers will bloom yearly as a reminder that He loves me forever.  They will remind me that when I feel alone, He is ALWAYS just a prayer away.  They will remind me that my seemingly unimportant requests are important to Him as He wants to build my faith, show me love, and remind me that I am His.

Jeremiah 29:12 - Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you.

Different Tradition, Same Jesus

So today is Easter Sunday, the fourth Sunday that my church, Maple City Baptist Church, has not been able to meet as a corporate group to worship.  I will admit that today I got teary when the roomie and I sent a video praise to Pastor Mike for the fantastic online service he, Pastor Beau and others put together.  Was it the same? Nope.  And you know what?  That's okay!

I've been dealing with COVID-19 intensely since mid March.  When you are in the field of public health, you see and hear way more than you can imagine.

Over the course of the past few weeks, many pastors have been trying to navigate the stay at home guidance (executive order in Illinois) and what that means for their church body. It's been hard to balance the loss of human contact with the need to keep folks as safe as can be during this pandemic.  I've spoken with several in various communities who were weighing how to meet the very real needs of their flock, continue to preach the gospel, and again, provide safety.  I applaud the very hard questions you've asked.  I applaud the prayer you've put into this effort.  I applaud those that have made hard decisions to close their doors out of an abundance of caution and as an example of Romans 13:1-2.  I praise you all for the innovative approaches using technology to reach your congregations through Sunday morning services, praise and worship services, small group meetings, Sunday school lessons, etc.  It's been so sweet.

I just want to take this post and give the Lord praise for my church's response to this.  I know the pastors and leadership weighed these questions heavily.  These leaders are some of the most innovative, bible believing, gospel preaching people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing.  They challenge me to get out of my comfort zone of safety and follow Jesus in risk taking.  That being said, it isn't done foolishly or with a lack of discernment.

At the end of the day, it's about Jesus. I've seen that in the way a whole host of folks from my church have been asked to provide teaching on their quiet time with Jesus.  We've been challenged ourselves to find ways to reach out to the lost around us.  We've been encouraged to be biblical in our responses, to lead by example, and to love and encourage each other during this time.  It isn't about our Pastors having to be in the spot light, but about Jesus being in the spotlight. That is true leadership and I am eternally grateful for that in my life.

Truly, for many believers, this Easter Sunday is like every other day.  We celebrate the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus daily! We live to make Him known.  We walk in relationship with Him every moment that we take a breath.  So, while Easter is a wonderful celebration reminder that the tomb is empty and that Jesus is who He says (God in the flesh), I am thankful to be celebrating it in the quiet of my own home.  Yep, I miss the hectic, loud family dinner with the Ewings.  I miss the hugs and laughter with them and my MCBC family. We will all survive this interruption of what we normally do.

I believe the Lord is gifting us with just quietly being with Him and thanking him for what He did on the cross for us.  Maybe He is removing all the man made traditions to allow us to really see Him? Adapting the words of Dr. Seuss from the Grinch Who Stole Christmas... "Maybe, just maybe, Easter is a little something more..."

 He is not here: for he is risen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay.  Matthew 28:6

Bendy

I've been saying for a few months that I am culturally irrelevant and posting a picture of this guy created in 1950 proves it.  When I talk with my younger, cooler friends I am constantly explaining some reference about which they are clueless.  Let me introduce you to Gumby.  I loved the Gumby and Pokey claymation show when I was a little kid.  I even had a Gumby doll that I could twist into all sorts of poses. Gumby was what my sister Jennifer would call 'bendy'.  He came to mind today when the Lord was speaking to my heart.

Not to belabor circumstances, but frankly they have have been off the charts lately.  A whole lot of spiritual warfare which has produced distraction, anger, exhaustion, tears, counseling, more tears, etc.  Well, you get the point.  Amidst all of this, I've been diligent about protecting my mind with word, praying diligently for truth to prevail, checking in with others for sharpening, and taking vain thoughts to the Lord.  Yet, I've noticed a kernel of hardness in my heart.  A bit of bitterness starting to take a hold.  I've seen it in my responses to perceived wrongs done (no, Jesus doesn't want me to throat punch people!), my desire to isolate (which is different than regrouping),  and wanting to quit (seriously, I am going to quit on the BEST thing that ever has happened to me?? Don't think so, Jesus!). 

But today...I was talking to the Lord on my way to work about all of this and He sweetly reminded me of something.  These circumstances aren't necessarily to change other's behaviors, but maybe to change me.  He asked me if I was willing to be molded into whom He is fashioning me to be.  Would I stand strong on the Word of Truth in spite of the culture?  Would I love others in spite of the hurt?  Would I risk my feelings of wanting to protect myself to protect and stand with others who are facing battles they shouldn't have to?  Am I willing to be bendy for Him, to let the Creator mold His creation into a woman who can influence others for eternity by her responses to circumstances? Sobering.  I admit, it causes trepidation in me.  Yet, how can I not trust Him, the keeper of my very soul, to handle those fears?  He loves us so.  Tired friend reading this,be encouraged.  He wants so much greater for you... be bendy!

But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand.  Isaiah 64:8