Presumptuous sin

Psalm 19:13 ~ Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then I shall be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression.

This verse was a part of my quiet time several days back and I have been meditating on the phrase "presumptuous sins" since reading it.  Contextually, it was tucked between verses where David was asking the Lord to cleanse him, to remove unknown sin from this heart and then sharing his heart's desire to have a mouth and a heart that pleased Him. I have read this before, and is oft the case, have skimmed over verse 13 to dwell on 14.  However, this time this verse has stuck in my memory bank to be played over and over. One of the many benefits of my time spent in Bible Institute is that I have developed a love for word studies.  

The word presumptuous has caused me to delve a bit deeper. I know when I use it, I am referencing someone who is a bit too confident, but I wondered how that applied to this verse. As I researched this in the Strong's concordance, it is defined as, "proud, swelling up, inflated, with the connected thought of insolence (rude, showing lack of respect for others) and impiety (lack of reverence for God)". As I have read these definitions, I understand why He didn't let me skim this verse this time. This is where my current struggle lies. I am finding myself in a place I call a mean season.  Nothing seems to be quite right.  As I shared with one of my inner circle, while I normally have one area of life that might be amiss, this is one of those times when every area is off kilter...home, work, ministry, personal relationships. I've also noticed my language is much 'saltier' than normal, my thoughts are darker and angrier, and my attitude is sour. Not who I want to be.

One of attributes I love the most about the Lord is His mercy on me.  I so frequently need it, that's for certain!  He loves me so much that He kept bringing this verse to the forefront of my thinking because He knew I needed to understand that in this season, my attitude often leads me to sinning presumptuously. My life long battle with arrogance rears its ugly head during these particular valleys in my walk with Him. Because of His refining me, THIS time I am starting to get it. I am beginning to see the problem in the midst of the issue instead of on the other end where I've found myself having to work through a multitude of layers of forgiveness or I have transgressed greatly and have to deal with the consequences of my choices. Sometimes for years to come.

This life of being a believer in Christ isn't easy most of the time. Yet, it's far more wonderful than my words can describe. Humbly thankful today for His saving grace and His sanctifying mercy.