Last Friday was an enjoyable day for me. I got to have lunch with a former college roommate and then dinner/movie with a couple of my girlfriends. Of course, the subject of men came up (hello, it's women sitting around talking...men are bound to be a topic somewhere in the convo!) with the usual conclusion ~ we don't understand how they think or why they do some of the things they do. Now, before any of my beloved male friends stop reading... I would bet many of you feel the same way about women... you just don't get us either. The evening culminated in watching yet another Hollywood take on good boy gone bad only to be brought back to good boy with some Dickenese characters thrown in to help him see the error of his ways. Ugh. I am so tired of those kinds of movies. The main character is a schmuck and after his supposed redemption, he becomes a lovable, sweet guy. I'd love to see the 'real-life' sequel of what happens after the 'happily ever after' wears off. Bet my paycheck the dude is still a schmuck and she's a cranky nag because he isn't living up to what she thinks he should be!
This whole thing got me to thinking about and praying for the men who are currently in my life and the one I've yet to meet. Do I put them in a 'Hollywood' type box and expect them to be like those in the movies? Do I want them to be the manly man, knight in shining armour all the while expecting them to think like a woman? Do I emasculate them with my penchant for wanting control? Do I expect them to be more than God does? Does my attitude/actions reflect respect for who they are right where God has them? While I want to be 'wowed' by Mr. Right, what does that look like in reality? As God often does, He gave me a nugget in my reading this morning that I've been chewing on. In I Cor. 16:13 it says, "Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong." I'll be honest... I was perplexed by this verse the first few times I read it. What the heck does 'quit like men' mean? So, I researched it a bit and found it means to act manly. Paul had been dealing with the church at Corinth and the many questions they had for him. Apparently, from previous verses, the roles of men and women in the Christian walk were questioned by those early believers. After 15 chapters of response, Paul was wrapping up his letter to them. And almost in the middle of this last chapter with no warning, he tells them to stand fast in their faith, be manly, to be strong and to do all with love (vs. 14). The light bulb went off for me. Isn't that really all we should want from the men in our lives? Stand fast in their faith, be a strong man and do all with love? Why do we let the world tell us that men need to be anything other than what God expects? Now, I'm all about people taking personal responsibility for their choices and lives, and guys, if you are anything less than God wants, that's on you. But now I'm talking to the ladies... we must do our very best to promote what God says a man should be like ~ not our own personal agenda or Hollywood's view. I see so many women trying to 'fix' the men in their lives to be something that God never intended him to be...and yours truly has been guilty of that as well. Gals, would you want him constantly trying to change who you are or do you want him relying on God to shape and mold you into the woman God wants you to be? Frankly, I know this will be seen as highly unpopular, 'old school' thinking... but I agree with God, not the world. I am praying that the men in my life are standing fast in their faith, are strong, manly men and do all with love and that God shows me how to live my life in a way that allows them be all HE desires them to be.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Hands Off
Proverbs 21:2 Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the hearts.
It's been awhile since I've blogged because it seems I haven't had much to say that would be of spiritual worth. It's been because I have been internally struggling with so much that I don't understand about God and His ways. Certainly, some of it is pride, some is living in my flesh and choosing not to do what He wants when I don't understand, and some is just flat out I don't get why God would allow _________________ (feel free to fill in the blank with your own question).
I've been dealing with some anger issues that I'm not too proud of and I know anger is derived from hurt. I've been really hurt that God didn't answer my prayers as I'd hoped. I've been hurt by the disappointment of people not choosing the best that they could for their lives and the lives of those around them. I've been hurt by the blatant selfishness I see around me. I have been wondering if I am making any impact with those around me. I have believers asking me for counsel and when I try to share the Word, they appear to walk the other way. I repeat the same lessons over and over and over to those I lead... to what appears to be no avail. Well... you get the picture. Then, as my Best Friend always does, Jesus has been working me through that hurt and anger. Last night it came to fruition and God used two of my 'inner circle' to help me over the hump.
My wise friend, Sherri, points out to me that I can't see what's going on inside of those around me. She's right. God proved it 3 times in the past week as the Word had soaked into the hearts of those I counseled and the brokenness came to the surface of two for whom I've been praying for several years. God, yet again, proved to me that He works in ways I don't understand, in HIS perfect time, in HIS perfect way. My wise friend, Michelle, pointed out to me today that sometimes I have to take a hands off approach... I am only responsible for doing what God calls me to do and the decisions of others is between them and the Lord. I knew that, but her wonderful way of explaining it from a parenting approach, which to me would be the ULTIMATE place to want to control, was much needed. I can't control the outcome. Then, during prayer, the Lord reminded me that just because people don't do/act/speak/serve/love as I do, doesn't mean that they are wrong or any less spiritual than I. It means he created me to do/act/speak/serve/love as He created Carla to do. Period. He also reminded me of the countless times I have had to learn the same lesson and that He has shown me grace through every mistake and He is asking the same of me towards others. With His blood being the price paid for me, how can I do anything less?
I am not God, therefore I cannot judge the hearts of others. I am not the Holy Spirit, therefore it is not my job to convict. I am not Jesus, therefore I cannot save. I am just Carla, therefore I want to love and serve.
It's been awhile since I've blogged because it seems I haven't had much to say that would be of spiritual worth. It's been because I have been internally struggling with so much that I don't understand about God and His ways. Certainly, some of it is pride, some is living in my flesh and choosing not to do what He wants when I don't understand, and some is just flat out I don't get why God would allow _________________ (feel free to fill in the blank with your own question).
I've been dealing with some anger issues that I'm not too proud of and I know anger is derived from hurt. I've been really hurt that God didn't answer my prayers as I'd hoped. I've been hurt by the disappointment of people not choosing the best that they could for their lives and the lives of those around them. I've been hurt by the blatant selfishness I see around me. I have been wondering if I am making any impact with those around me. I have believers asking me for counsel and when I try to share the Word, they appear to walk the other way. I repeat the same lessons over and over and over to those I lead... to what appears to be no avail. Well... you get the picture. Then, as my Best Friend always does, Jesus has been working me through that hurt and anger. Last night it came to fruition and God used two of my 'inner circle' to help me over the hump.
My wise friend, Sherri, points out to me that I can't see what's going on inside of those around me. She's right. God proved it 3 times in the past week as the Word had soaked into the hearts of those I counseled and the brokenness came to the surface of two for whom I've been praying for several years. God, yet again, proved to me that He works in ways I don't understand, in HIS perfect time, in HIS perfect way. My wise friend, Michelle, pointed out to me today that sometimes I have to take a hands off approach... I am only responsible for doing what God calls me to do and the decisions of others is between them and the Lord. I knew that, but her wonderful way of explaining it from a parenting approach, which to me would be the ULTIMATE place to want to control, was much needed. I can't control the outcome. Then, during prayer, the Lord reminded me that just because people don't do/act/speak/serve/love as I do, doesn't mean that they are wrong or any less spiritual than I. It means he created me to do/act/speak/serve/love as He created Carla to do. Period. He also reminded me of the countless times I have had to learn the same lesson and that He has shown me grace through every mistake and He is asking the same of me towards others. With His blood being the price paid for me, how can I do anything less?
I am not God, therefore I cannot judge the hearts of others. I am not the Holy Spirit, therefore it is not my job to convict. I am not Jesus, therefore I cannot save. I am just Carla, therefore I want to love and serve.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Fasting
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13
Today I write after a week's absence of being quiet. I had decided through much prayer and encouragement of the Holy Spirit to partake in a biblical fast last week. I've yet to process all of the spiritual implications of the fast and I probably won't discuss them via blog as it was an intensely personal (my friends are welcome to ask!). It was truly the paradox of bittersweet... bitterness at the circumstances and firestorms that I, with Christ, had to endure and walk thru...sweetness at the depth of peace I felt during the whole thing. I did question,at the time, why He called me to do this last week, considering all that went down, but now on this side of it, I know His timing is perfect.
One thing I will share is that my Lord is the conqueror of fear. I fought doing the fast because I feared failing at it. I knew that I am a food addict and to give it up would set me up to probably fail. And in my own power, that would have happened. I will tell you... He is faithful and will supply all your needs when He calls you to a task, ministry, or whatever. I was able to complete the 5 days without any food (juice and water only). I'm excited that once and for all, I KNOW my God is bigger than my weakness. Oh, food is still a struggle for me and no doubt will be for the rest of my life because of various and asundry issues related to it...but it's not the stronghold it once was. I've learned that there are two actions to the above verse... I can do...which means I have to make an effort...and through Christ...which means He has to be a part of it. I would caution anyone looking to do a fast from anything to make certain that He is directing it, otherwise it's just deprivation for no biblical reason. Seek counsel from a godly source before starting if you are unsure. If you are a young person, do NOT do this without your parent's permission. Lastly, while doing it, don't tell anyone that isn't necessary. Those you live with will obviously know, but this is a deeply personal experience...allow it to be!
Hugs ~
Today I write after a week's absence of being quiet. I had decided through much prayer and encouragement of the Holy Spirit to partake in a biblical fast last week. I've yet to process all of the spiritual implications of the fast and I probably won't discuss them via blog as it was an intensely personal (my friends are welcome to ask!). It was truly the paradox of bittersweet... bitterness at the circumstances and firestorms that I, with Christ, had to endure and walk thru...sweetness at the depth of peace I felt during the whole thing. I did question,at the time, why He called me to do this last week, considering all that went down, but now on this side of it, I know His timing is perfect.
One thing I will share is that my Lord is the conqueror of fear. I fought doing the fast because I feared failing at it. I knew that I am a food addict and to give it up would set me up to probably fail. And in my own power, that would have happened. I will tell you... He is faithful and will supply all your needs when He calls you to a task, ministry, or whatever. I was able to complete the 5 days without any food (juice and water only). I'm excited that once and for all, I KNOW my God is bigger than my weakness. Oh, food is still a struggle for me and no doubt will be for the rest of my life because of various and asundry issues related to it...but it's not the stronghold it once was. I've learned that there are two actions to the above verse... I can do...which means I have to make an effort...and through Christ...which means He has to be a part of it. I would caution anyone looking to do a fast from anything to make certain that He is directing it, otherwise it's just deprivation for no biblical reason. Seek counsel from a godly source before starting if you are unsure. If you are a young person, do NOT do this without your parent's permission. Lastly, while doing it, don't tell anyone that isn't necessary. Those you live with will obviously know, but this is a deeply personal experience...allow it to be!
Hugs ~
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Never Forsaken
Mark 15:34 And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? which is, being interpreted, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?
Last night in the college group, we were discussing our purpose in life. I have to admit that while I know it's to bring Him glory, I'm still working on how that looks in my daily life. In the process of the conversation, we talked about how lonely it can be to stand for the Lord. It got me to thinking about the feeling of being forsaken.
I've never felt that I was forsaken a day in my life. I've always been blessed by having good parents who cared about my well-being, good friends who come along side to encourage me, and a Lord who loves me indescribably. Yes, there are times of acute loneliness, even being in the middle of many people. Times when I don't think there is another person on the planet who understands me or my situation. Times when I truly don't want to do this walk even one more day. As I shared with the students, we must accept the fact that there will be loneliness and times of being alone. But for those who have trusted Christ, there will never be a moment of being forsaken. When I read the above verse today, I have a bittersweet reaction to it. I think what it must have been like for Jesus to experience that total ripping apart from the Father he'd known for eternity past. How suffocating the total aloneness would have been. How He had to know that He would be rejected by many. He'd never been separated from Abba Father.... and He did it because of me. Because of my sin. Because of my separation. And the sad thing, the very fact that until He opened my eyes to my need, I didn't even realize I was apart from God. I am humbled that He did that for me, ever so grateful, and loving Him even more. Thank you, Jesus.
Last night in the college group, we were discussing our purpose in life. I have to admit that while I know it's to bring Him glory, I'm still working on how that looks in my daily life. In the process of the conversation, we talked about how lonely it can be to stand for the Lord. It got me to thinking about the feeling of being forsaken.
I've never felt that I was forsaken a day in my life. I've always been blessed by having good parents who cared about my well-being, good friends who come along side to encourage me, and a Lord who loves me indescribably. Yes, there are times of acute loneliness, even being in the middle of many people. Times when I don't think there is another person on the planet who understands me or my situation. Times when I truly don't want to do this walk even one more day. As I shared with the students, we must accept the fact that there will be loneliness and times of being alone. But for those who have trusted Christ, there will never be a moment of being forsaken. When I read the above verse today, I have a bittersweet reaction to it. I think what it must have been like for Jesus to experience that total ripping apart from the Father he'd known for eternity past. How suffocating the total aloneness would have been. How He had to know that He would be rejected by many. He'd never been separated from Abba Father.... and He did it because of me. Because of my sin. Because of my separation. And the sad thing, the very fact that until He opened my eyes to my need, I didn't even realize I was apart from God. I am humbled that He did that for me, ever so grateful, and loving Him even more. Thank you, Jesus.
Friday, March 13, 2009
The Adventure of Him
Strife: angry contention, rivalry
Boy, that can be me. Not a very attractive trait, I admit. I don't get why I have to be contentious at all. Why can't I just go with the flow instead of making an issue? Why do I make anything a rivalry instead of looking for camaraderie?
But, I've witnessed victory this week. It all started with the Third Day Concert. There was a point when the lead singer, Mac Powell, lead a time of worship between the songs 'Cry out to Jesus' and 'Revelation' that I knew God was there with me at that moment. It's hard to explain, but it seems I'd been strife filled and manipulating against God and others for quite some time and at that moment, everything fell into place when I let go. It was freeing. Instead of the passion of being fired up about controlling situations, I was, to the core of my being, excited about a future that is unknown by me, but certainly known by my Lord. It was saying no to the sameness of me and saying yes to the adventure of Him. Funny thing...God wasn't done teaching me that lesson... He did the same thing when I spoke at UNiTE and during a talk with a friend. Both had their moments of me striving against it, fighting doing what I know God wanted from me, but in the end, I said yes to the adventure of the unknown by me. And did God bless me. He gave me such peace in both situations ~ joy in teaching and studying for UNiTE and deepening my level of respect for my friend. I'm thinking I'm going to like not striving....
Proverbs 20:3
It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling.
Boy, that can be me. Not a very attractive trait, I admit. I don't get why I have to be contentious at all. Why can't I just go with the flow instead of making an issue? Why do I make anything a rivalry instead of looking for camaraderie?
But, I've witnessed victory this week. It all started with the Third Day Concert. There was a point when the lead singer, Mac Powell, lead a time of worship between the songs 'Cry out to Jesus' and 'Revelation' that I knew God was there with me at that moment. It's hard to explain, but it seems I'd been strife filled and manipulating against God and others for quite some time and at that moment, everything fell into place when I let go. It was freeing. Instead of the passion of being fired up about controlling situations, I was, to the core of my being, excited about a future that is unknown by me, but certainly known by my Lord. It was saying no to the sameness of me and saying yes to the adventure of Him. Funny thing...God wasn't done teaching me that lesson... He did the same thing when I spoke at UNiTE and during a talk with a friend. Both had their moments of me striving against it, fighting doing what I know God wanted from me, but in the end, I said yes to the adventure of the unknown by me. And did God bless me. He gave me such peace in both situations ~ joy in teaching and studying for UNiTE and deepening my level of respect for my friend. I'm thinking I'm going to like not striving....
Proverbs 20:3
It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
A change is brewing....
I'm beat... but it's a good kind of tired today. The kind that comes after working hard at something coupled with the high of a great accomplishment, then the natural return to the ordinary. What makes it awesome is that it was work that the Lord wanted me to do.
Last night, I gave the message at our youth meeting. I taught on the life of Mary finding the study and delivery of God's word has bubbled a change in me unlike anything I've experienced. I'm hooked... I want to know and teach His Word to women. Last night, looking in the eyes those young women in the audience, any doubts of where I belong in ministry was erased. Those girls need examples of women living their lives for the Lord...and not just the married moms. I admit that I have been battling that lie from the enemy far too long. Somewhere in my twisted thinking, I have come to believe that if I don't fit the social norm of a church, I'm not worthwhile. Now, let me be completely clear... through NO fault of any person at church has this occurred. I've allowed the shallow thinking of a very select few from my distant past affect my level of commitment because I believed I didn't fit. It's MY problem. It's time to move past that. I've allowed that ignorant fallacy to hold me back from being all that He has made me to be. Who I am is who He made me. I embrace that. I am unique, fearfully and wonderfully made... and I want those young women, sitting in those pews, believing the lies of the world that they are nothing to embrace who God made them to be. I want them to know that they can serve the Lord in ways they never dreamed possible...missionaries, teachers, leaders, evangelists...God can and will use them ~ single or married. I want to be a catalyst in women's lives to help them live to serve Him. I want live what I believe.... sold out. I want to stand on the truth of the Word, able to say hard words through the covering of grace and mercy. I want my world to know about the Savior.
I so want to be like Jesus.
Luke 1:37-38
For with God nothing shall be impossible. And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word.
Last night, I gave the message at our youth meeting. I taught on the life of Mary finding the study and delivery of God's word has bubbled a change in me unlike anything I've experienced. I'm hooked... I want to know and teach His Word to women. Last night, looking in the eyes those young women in the audience, any doubts of where I belong in ministry was erased. Those girls need examples of women living their lives for the Lord...and not just the married moms. I admit that I have been battling that lie from the enemy far too long. Somewhere in my twisted thinking, I have come to believe that if I don't fit the social norm of a church, I'm not worthwhile. Now, let me be completely clear... through NO fault of any person at church has this occurred. I've allowed the shallow thinking of a very select few from my distant past affect my level of commitment because I believed I didn't fit. It's MY problem. It's time to move past that. I've allowed that ignorant fallacy to hold me back from being all that He has made me to be. Who I am is who He made me. I embrace that. I am unique, fearfully and wonderfully made... and I want those young women, sitting in those pews, believing the lies of the world that they are nothing to embrace who God made them to be. I want them to know that they can serve the Lord in ways they never dreamed possible...missionaries, teachers, leaders, evangelists...God can and will use them ~ single or married. I want to be a catalyst in women's lives to help them live to serve Him. I want live what I believe.... sold out. I want to stand on the truth of the Word, able to say hard words through the covering of grace and mercy. I want my world to know about the Savior.
I so want to be like Jesus.
Luke 1:37-38
For with God nothing shall be impossible. And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Caution: Orange Barrel Ahead
Last night was a fun night for me. I got to go see one of my favorite bands, Third Day, perform along with two other acts. It was music bliss for me. However, my moment of music nirvana was almost erased by what occurred on my way to the concert.
There were two car loads of us heading up for the concert, men in the van ahead of my vehicle full of women. I was enjoying the conversation and trying to keep pace with Andy so that we could all go into the concert together. As we were approaching the city, there was much construction going on, with ramps merging, exits closing, and hundreds of those orange barrels warning drivers of changes. With eyes fixed on the van, I'm keeping close... too close. At the last second, Andy whips the van into the left lane. I try to follow suit only to see the striped orange barrel in my way like a linebacker planted on the line not ready to let anyone pass. To over correct would have been disasterous, so I did the only thing I could... I clipped that puppy at 50 MPH. Yep, hit it, knocking my mirror into the passenger window and scaring everyone in the car. As we recovered, I witness the heads of several men in the van snapping around to see what happened. Instantly, I was embarrassed because I figured they were going to give me MUCH grief about my driving. However, I knew that I was following too close and not paying attention to the cautions that rose up all around me. I knew that hitting that barrel wasn't Andy's fault, but mine.
This incident got me to thinking about the dangers of following another person too closely in life. Just as I had my eyes fixed on following Andy, all too often in life I have found myself with my eyes on another person to lead me, instead of having my eyes fixed on the Lord. I've followed a pastor too close, placing unrealistic expectations on a mere man, only to be sorely disappointed when he didn't live up to the level that I felt he should. I've followed a boss too close, placing my life in someone's hands that didn't have God anywhere in his vision. I've wrongly followed a few men over the years that I thought would be that leader in my life, only to find that he didn't know where he was going either. Looking back, each of those scenarios had tons of warnings and orange barrels scattered around them, warning me to be cautious and wise. Yet, I've clipped one too many barrels in those situations, putting dings and dents in my armor, all because I took my eyes off the True Leader.
It also made me think about my role as a leader/mentor in others lives. Because of Jesus being who He is in my life, my mind was functioning correctly and got ahold of my mouth and I was able to admit my mistake to the women in my car and not blame Andy. This was a priceless teachable moment to Princess S sitting in the back seat. She witnessed an adult owning up to being wrong to others. (Of course, being the 15 year old expert driver, she did point out the fact that I wasn't following the 2 second rule... then I had to humble my self again and admit I didn't have a clue about the 2 second rule... but I digress....) I've also thought about the others in my life who may be following me a little too closely. I want to be a good example with my life, but I want that example to always point them to Jesus. That's where any success in my life lies... in who He is in me. Oh Father, help me to never allow anyone to think I have it all together, of my own ability.
Now the rest of the story... as we drove the remaining blocks to the concert, I will admit that I threatened to hit whichever guy was first to comment (hey, I told you I don't have it together!) only to be humbled by the fact that they really didn't (ok, they either got it all out of their systems before they got out of the van, or I need to seriously give my brothers more credit!!) and we got a good chuckle out of the whole event. Surprisingly, there was NO damage to my car, but God gave me a great lesson in the process.
I Peter 2:21
For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps
There were two car loads of us heading up for the concert, men in the van ahead of my vehicle full of women. I was enjoying the conversation and trying to keep pace with Andy so that we could all go into the concert together. As we were approaching the city, there was much construction going on, with ramps merging, exits closing, and hundreds of those orange barrels warning drivers of changes. With eyes fixed on the van, I'm keeping close... too close. At the last second, Andy whips the van into the left lane. I try to follow suit only to see the striped orange barrel in my way like a linebacker planted on the line not ready to let anyone pass. To over correct would have been disasterous, so I did the only thing I could... I clipped that puppy at 50 MPH. Yep, hit it, knocking my mirror into the passenger window and scaring everyone in the car. As we recovered, I witness the heads of several men in the van snapping around to see what happened. Instantly, I was embarrassed because I figured they were going to give me MUCH grief about my driving. However, I knew that I was following too close and not paying attention to the cautions that rose up all around me. I knew that hitting that barrel wasn't Andy's fault, but mine.
This incident got me to thinking about the dangers of following another person too closely in life. Just as I had my eyes fixed on following Andy, all too often in life I have found myself with my eyes on another person to lead me, instead of having my eyes fixed on the Lord. I've followed a pastor too close, placing unrealistic expectations on a mere man, only to be sorely disappointed when he didn't live up to the level that I felt he should. I've followed a boss too close, placing my life in someone's hands that didn't have God anywhere in his vision. I've wrongly followed a few men over the years that I thought would be that leader in my life, only to find that he didn't know where he was going either. Looking back, each of those scenarios had tons of warnings and orange barrels scattered around them, warning me to be cautious and wise. Yet, I've clipped one too many barrels in those situations, putting dings and dents in my armor, all because I took my eyes off the True Leader.
It also made me think about my role as a leader/mentor in others lives. Because of Jesus being who He is in my life, my mind was functioning correctly and got ahold of my mouth and I was able to admit my mistake to the women in my car and not blame Andy. This was a priceless teachable moment to Princess S sitting in the back seat. She witnessed an adult owning up to being wrong to others. (Of course, being the 15 year old expert driver, she did point out the fact that I wasn't following the 2 second rule... then I had to humble my self again and admit I didn't have a clue about the 2 second rule... but I digress....) I've also thought about the others in my life who may be following me a little too closely. I want to be a good example with my life, but I want that example to always point them to Jesus. That's where any success in my life lies... in who He is in me. Oh Father, help me to never allow anyone to think I have it all together, of my own ability.
Now the rest of the story... as we drove the remaining blocks to the concert, I will admit that I threatened to hit whichever guy was first to comment (hey, I told you I don't have it together!) only to be humbled by the fact that they really didn't (ok, they either got it all out of their systems before they got out of the van, or I need to seriously give my brothers more credit!!) and we got a good chuckle out of the whole event. Surprisingly, there was NO damage to my car, but God gave me a great lesson in the process.
I Peter 2:21
For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps
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